But we were then perfect [17 Jul 2009|11:04pm] chefsy Opposite of what we had years back but I don't mind. I don't intend to know your whatabouts, whereabouts and what have you after you have disrespected my parents which I HAVE NEVER DONE TO YOURS. post comment

grief [17 Jul 2009|11:39am] pazette let me tell you what it's like. i was eating dinner a while ago and out of habit i thought, i wonder if papa is still allowed to eat shrimp? then just like that, it grips you. it sneaks from behind and takes a hold of you. so you cry because that's the only thing that makes sense right now. you cry for a while more until you suddenly stop. why are we crying again? ahh, you remember. because at this very moment, papa is lying on a stainless, cold table. lifeless. it's very difficult to imagine because just a few hours ago, he was still there. warm. breathing. maybe the whole thing is not true. it's just probably one of those scenarios you run through your mind once in a while to prepare for the unexpected. hmmm. denial is a happy place. a deep lake. peaceful and healing on the surface. don't scan the depth. but something just keeps reminding you of reality. all the black clothes tightly packed in a bag. a plane ticket home. tonight. short notice. it's true, he's gone. wake up, wake up! so you remind yourself that you have to start moving on without him. and there's the real killer. how do you move on? move on from the first and only man who loves you truly. impossible. so you don't move on, you stay there. because honestly, what does moving on mean? you search for the answer, you overthink, you feel numb. drained. acceptance is a dark and scary place. a deep ocean. an endless horizon. a bottomless pit. grief. it comes and goes. small waves, big waves. stealthily, noisily. what can i tell you about grief? nothing really. denial is a bliss. denial. denial. denial. a happy place. post comment

[17 Jul 2009|12:03pm] zeeheehee [ mood | freezing ] ( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. ) 6 comments|post comment

MemcacheD Update [16 Jul 2009|02:17pm] lj_maintenance [mhwest] [ mood | busy ] [ music | NOFX - San Francisco Fat ] Just wanted to let everyone know, that a new version of MemcacheD has been released. We will be rolling this out to the memcache nodes during the week of July 20th to 24th. This should have very little impact on the stability of the website; however users may see a slight increase in load times as the cache is re-populated with entries. The software has been tested and verified to be working just fine with the application; so we perceive this to be a very minimal risk in regards to updating, and the stability of the website. Thanks... 30 comments|post comment

[16 Jul 2009|07:45am] nursing [jesuisgringoire] can anyone explain to me the requirements to be a CNA in Massachusetts? 6 comments|post comment

Notes, Geo-Location, Pingbacks, Birthday Wishes, and More [15 Jul 2009|04:12pm] news [theljstaff] New Notes Feature Automatic Detect Location Pingbacks for All Birthday Wishes ( Read more... ) 285 comments|post comment

i try :) [15 Jul 2009|10:51pm] starsplashes Can't wait for my orders: The Passion by Jeanette Winterson Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit by JW AND THE BEST OF ALL: HISTORY OF LOVE by Nicole Krauss. Right now, I'm reading The God of Small Things. The book is a Very Lovely Surprise :) 3 comments|post comment

Chapter 2 [15 Jul 2009|02:44pm] zeeheehee [ mood | contemplative ] ( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. ) post comment

but i loved him so [14 Jul 2009|02:41pm] chefsy One by one, my then bestest guy friends are getting married. One down! 2 comments|post comment

I Knew That Drama Last Week Had To Bring Something Good... [14 Jul 2009|01:46pm] zeeheehee [ mood | ecstatic ] ( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. ) 9 comments|post comment

The Aftermath [13 Jul 2009|08:00am] zeeheehee [ mood | cheerful ] ( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. ) post comment

Sunday Secrets [12 Jul 2009|12:01am] postsecret http://postsecret.blogspot.com/2009/07/sunday-secrets_12.html PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a postcard. -----Email Message----- I'm an avid gardener and 50, and have been making plans where to start my first crop :) -----Email Message----- It's Sunday and I am carefully watching the visitor count at the very bottom of this page. I am going to try to be your quarter billionth visitor! -----Email Message----- It was 2:16 AM in NJ when I was on - and so were 614 others. It finally shook that feeling that was keeping me awake. The feeling of being alone. -----Email Message----- I live in Tennessee, so I have taken countless childhood field trips to the falls. Now that I look back on it, a giant underground waterfall probably ISN'T the safest environment for children. :) -----Email Message----- One of my fondest childhood memories was a trip to Chattanooga with my family when I was eight. I was so shy back then, but the friendly tour guides at Ruby Falls were so nice to me and seemed to enjoy talking to everyone that they inspired me to break out of my shell. When I got home from the trip I made my very first friends at school. Thanks for that. -----Email Message----- My memories working at 31 Flavors involve dry ice bombs in the parking lot. But I really hope people mail more "secret acts of kindness" like yours. -----Email Message----- Thank you for opening my mind to the fact that those people in my own life deserve thanks! I'll be making a few phone calls tonight. I am thrilled to present the cover for the new PostSecret book which has more than 250 never-before-seen secrets. Pre-order your copy today. (Thanks for supporting PostSecret.) If you've mailed a secret to me and haven't seen it posted, you may find it in this book. Saturday Secrets & More . . . Follow PostSecret on Twitter. 317 comments|post comment

I dont need any.. [12 Jul 2009|11:59am] chefsy I don't need a boy to make me happy nor do I need a man to complete me since my friends are all here as my family but then again when they all start being in a relationship, get married and have their own family to call for themselves - which family am I going to end up with? Just myself. Fine, Where is this man? 2 comments|post comment

Award [11 Jul 2009|04:08pm] zeeheehee ( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. ) post comment

[10 Jul 2009|07:24am] nursing [jesuisgringoire] [ mood | worried ] hi there - I'm a student nurse, I just signed up for my first clinical rotation, and it's at the VA hospital in my city. this may be a ridiculous question, but for religious reasons I don't do things like stand up for the national anthem, pledge alliegence, salute(?), and all the rest.  is this going to be an issue working at a VA hospital, or am I being paranoid?  I've never even set food inside one so I really have no idea.  even in public high school I occasionally got screamed at for sitting (politely and quietly) during the pledge, and I'm just curious if I have more of that to look foreward to during this experience. I hope it goes without saying that I intend to commit myself to being the best student I can and providing the best care possible wherever I'm at, and I'm not trying to be controversial or start debate (either here or god-forbid at my clinical.) 14 comments|post comment

=( [10 Jul 2009|03:52pm] zeeheehee ( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. ) post comment

like a 4-inch killer [06 Jul 2009|01:40pm] pazette first few days at the new office has that same happy yet pained feeling when wearing brand new shoes. 2 comments|post comment

Sunday Secrets [05 Jul 2009|12:01am] postsecret http://postsecret.blogspot.com/2009/07/sunday-secrets.html PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a postcard. -----Email Message----- I feel sorry for those who do think this was the time of their life.  They have around 60 years after this without a better time. -----Email Message----- I always count how many seconds I pee, too. And if I pee less than 7 seconds I get the feeling the peeing was not worth it. -----Email Message----- I sent in the secret about my art meaning something to anyone other than myself. The postmark is probably Charlotte. I never imagined it would make it up there! It was quite a terrifying experience, because my aunt is a gossip, and she works at the post office. Anyway, when I looked earlier, there was a snippet of an e-mail message underneath the postcard image, and when I checked back today, it was gone. I would like to say that it provided me a great deal of comfort and understanding. It sparked a revelation in me. -----Email Message----- Dear Frank, I have been an avid follower of PostSecret for many years now. When I saw the tattoo a woman got of one of the secrets--"We accept the love we think we deserve"--I knew that I wanted a PostSecret tattoo, as well. I waited patiently every week for the secret that jumped out at me, went to PostSecret events and followed you on Twitter. I found my PostSecret quote, and the funniest part is it was written on the envelope in which their secret was contained, and yet, the minute I read it I knew it was mine. . . More Secrets & Stories - Follow PostSecret on Twitter. 401 comments|post comment

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